Jake had always been a scrawny guy. Even back in middle school, the jocks in the locker room used to make fun of him for his short, skinny size and lack of natural athletic talent. He dreaded going to gym class because of all the wedgies and humiliation he would receive. When Jake got to college, on a full academic scholarship, he decided that his days of being a nerdy outcast were over. Now was the time to start again and re-make himself as the cool, popular guy on campus. The one thing that he wanted to try first was football. Growing up, he was never very good at the sport. He tried playing with the other kids, but they were always quick to tackle him and even quicker to laugh at him. But none of that mattered, he still loved the sport and always had a secret dream of being a football player despite his scrawny size. In his room, he proudly hung up a Roethlisberger jersey and caught games on tv whenever he could. Something about the excitement and masculine glory of football always appealed to him. Occassionally he had dreams at night of charging up the field, avoiding every tackle that came his way, and triumphantly making it to the end zone. At one point in high school, he even tried out for the football team, but he could never match up to the other guys. Every time the ball came his way, it went straight through his hands and crashed into his face. Upon entering college, he quickly scouted out any intramural football teams that would take him.
Given that he was going to a large state school, there were plenty of intramural opportunities around. Of course, this school had a really good varsity football team, but he knew he could never make it to that level, so he had to settle for something smaller. What he found was a small team of guys, mostly composed of random fraternity brothers that just loved the sport like Jake. They didn’t receive much funding from the school and only occassionally competed in outside games against intramural teams from other schools. Some of them played football in high school, but most had only minimal experience. When they accepted Jake into their team, he was overjoyed. Immediately, he started fantasizing about putting on his pads, wearing his jersey around campus, and waking up every day for workouts and practice.
On the first day of practice, he realized that he had a long way to go before being game ready. Many of the exercises the coach made them go through, he could only limply accomplish. Not to mention the fact that his small size hindered his ability on the field. Despite these disadvantages, the other guys on the team didn’t seem to mind his lack of ability. He was on the team and that’s all that mattered. And so it went for a while, Jake gradually improving with each practice, getting some knocks and bruises in along the way, but still looking forward to the day when he could stand on the field as a true player. The one rule that he always had to follow was that there was the locker room for varsity players and one for club sports and intramural sports. He was not allowed to use the varsity locker room.
When it came time to order his gear, he was ecstatic. As soon as the gear arrived, he quickly got it out and put it on. He stood in front of the full-body mirror in his room wearing his cleats, football pants, under armour, shoulder pads, and jersey as proud as ever. Anyone looking at him would have said that he looked ridiculous because of how the gear looked five sizes too big, but that didn’t matter to him. Jake had seen other football players clutch the opening of their shoulder pads before, so he did the same and gave a wide, smirking grin.
After one practice on a particularly hot day, Jake headed down to the locker rooms with his gym bag, drenched in sweat. Usually, he sweat more than the other guys, but today he was really soaked. He took the normal route to the designated locker room, but much to his surprise it was inexplicably locked. Desperately needing a shower and a change of clothes, he decided that today it might be alright to use the varsity locker rooms just this once. After all, there couldn’t be much harm in it. So he headed over to the varsity locker rooms. Upon entering, he breathed a sigh of relief on finding that they were completely empty.
But no sooner did he feel relieved than he heard the locker room doors swing wide open and gaze with worried eyes at the sight of three hot, sweaty bodies walk in. The three individuals in particular were Andrew, Mike, and Warren. All were on the varsity football team and had just gotten back from a victorious game, still wearing all of their sweaty football gear. They walked into the locker room with their arms around each other’s shoulders and laughing their asses off. Suffice to say, each had a little too much to drink when celebrating their win that day. Immediately upon seeing Jake in a state of stunned concern, they stopped in their tracks and gave him sinister grins.
“What the hell is this scrawny little nerd doing in here?”, asked Warren.
“You’re definitely not on the team”, said Andrew.
“You know what we do to nerds that don’t follow the rules?”, asked Mike while pacing up to Jake. “We punish them”, he said while hovering over Jake and breathing right onto his face. As soon as he said that, Andrew and warren quickly grabbed hold of Jake’s arms and pinned him down to the ground.
“Now, how should we punish this little nerd, boys?”, asked Mike.
“Wedgies, swirlies, noogies”, said Andrew.
“Let’s give him purple nurples that he’ll never forget”, said Warren. Mike shook his head and said:
“You know what I’ve always wanted to do, but only ever heard about?…..a butt bomb”.
Andrew and Warren looked at each other with bright eyes and big grins, recognizing that each knew what that was and that it was the right course of action. All three of them had only ever heard about it from other guys on the team, but never really believed that it had happened. A butt bomb is where you stick a nerd’s head down the back of a jock’s tight pants and keep their face there while the jock takes a huge shit. One guy on the team said that he did it to a nerd in high school after giving that nerd a powerhouse round of wedgies.
So now for a little bit about Mike. He was a wide receiver and one of the tallest, strongest guys on the team. Prior to the game that day, he had been vigorously carbo loading to build up his strength. For lunch that day, he wolfed down everything he could get his hands on from cheesesteaks to beefy bean burritos and triple-stacked cheeseburgers. Throughout the game, the pressure had been building up tremendously inside his guts, accompanied by sounds of grumbling and occasional farting. During a few points during the game and afterward, he legitimately thought he might shit his pants. Of course, after they won, all the guys on the team joined in on a celebration of beer and cheering, so he couldn’t just hop off to the bathroom, but had to stay and enjoy the revelry. After chugging down some beers, which only added to the pressure building up in his guts, he realized that he couldn’t wait any longer and had to make it to the bathrooms quick before all hell broke loose inside his football pants. At the time, the closest bathrooms were the ones in the locker rooms, so he made his way over to them while Andrew and Warren followed.
When Mike suggested giving Jake a butt bomb, he did so because he felt a deep, ominous grumbling in his stomach indicating that the time was fast approaching for him to explode. Something about all the beers he drank up to this point and the sweaty, masculine revelry he had participated in gave him the idea to give the scrawny, little nerd before him a legendary butt bomb.
Andrew and Warren, who were also sufficiently drunk at this point, happily agreed and lifted up Jake to face Mike, who had turned around and started loosening the belt on his football pants. Jake was quickly lifted up into the air and turned up side down by both Andrew and Warren, who found him to be quite easy to lift on account of Jake’s small size. Despite some initial squirming, Jake could not break free of their hold on him. They turned him around so that by now Jake’s stomach was pressed firmly up against Mike’s back and Jake’s face pressed up against Mike’s ass.
Andrew opened up the back of Mike’s football pants while Warren pushed Jake’s head down into the back of Mike’s pants. The tightness of the football pants only secured Jake’s head in Mike’s sweaty football pants. Jake’s face was now firmly squished into Mike’s ass crack. Someone watching this might have remarked how puny Jake looked up against Mike’s back.
Mike grabbed Jake’s flailing arms and pressed them up against his stomach so it looked like Jake was giving him an upside down hug. Andrew and Warren grabbed hold of Jake’s legs so that there was no escape from his predicament.
Mike’s stomach gave another deep growl, which Jake could even feel with his hands. This one was even so deep that Mike cringed in pain as he knew what was coming.
“Ohhhhhh fuck, this little nerd has no idea what’s coming for him”, Mike said. This was followed by another growl from his packed guts, that let Mike know that a whole mountain of shit was about to explode into his pants and Jake will get it face first.
One more deep rumbling occurred, which Mike recognized as the final one before all hell broke loose. There was no holding it back. An entire day of cheesesteaks, beefy bean burritos, cheeseburgers, tacos, pizza, and beer was about to come rushing out. Even Jake, who could feel every stomach rumbling, knew that it was fast approaching, and so he let out a low moan.
In a split second, a continuous way of explosive shitting hit Jake face first and filled Mike’s football pants to the brim. It was so massive and came out with such explosive force, that it even burst out a little from his pants and coated the bottom of Mike’s jersey. The back of his football pants, which were a stark white before, had now turned into a solid brown. All Mike could say was a slow, low “fuuuuccccckkkk” as he just let out the most relieving shit in his life. Andrew and Warren could not believe what they were seeing. They had just witnessed a legendary butt bomb.
Mike let go of Jake’s hands, and Andrew and Warren let go of his legs. Jake plopped down onto the ground with his whole head, hair and all, covered in Mike’s mess. All three of the varsity football players gave each other congratulatory high fives after executing such an impressive butt bomb.
Mike, who now had to clean up, took off his soiled football pants to reveal his equally soiled undies. They were tighty whities, but had now been turned into a deep brown. To add insult to injury, he took off these soiled tighty whities and dropped them down onto Jake’s head while he was still lying there. Mike gave out a tiny laugh and triumphantly said “You just made history, nerd” before heading off to the stalls.