Questionable decision making

Please try not to judge me as I explain a quick decision that didn’t end well for me.

I played hockey in college. I was a goaltender. The amount of gear that I had to wear prevented any real movement off the ice. Needless to say when it came time to pee, which invariably happened during a game, it was a real problem. After an unfortunate accident wetting my uniform I realized how nearly impossible it was for anyone to notice, which solved a very annoying problem. From that day on, if I had to go I’d let it out while playing in moderate spurts throughout the game. My underclothes were so sweaty that even undressing in the locker room wasn’t a problem. After a streak of wins while wearing wet clothes I started to get superstitious about it. In my mind if I didn’t pee in my uniform then my performance would be at stake. I know. Weird. It gets worse.

I wore dark black skinny jeans every day. It didn’t take long for me to start spurting in those too. No one ever noticed and since I had this idea that I was more “lucky” with a little bit of pee in my pants it became a regular habit. I had to wash my clothes more than usual, but that was a small price to pay for being lucky every day. My grades were up, as was my confidence. Girls were always smiling at me. I’d never felt better. Then I got cocky about it, which never leads to a great outcome.

My secret life hack turned on me in April of my junior year, which meant that I’d been spurting pee into my pants for over a year with quantifiable results. My already questionable decision making faltered after a large, late lunch after classes on a sunny Friday afternoon. As I walked across campus to get a haircut I noted the need to use the bathroom. A bathroom would be required as it wasn’t pee knocking on the door. Urgency grew quickly and I found myself mapping out all the bathrooms between me and the barber. Then in a flash of misguided inspiration I made that quick decision. I’m sure you can already guess what it was. I took out my phone, leaned against a tree trunk in the shade and proceeded to fully poop my pants. This was not a controlled spurt. I felt my underwear and jeans stretch in strange ways as a great bulk eased out. The warmth and texture on my skin combined with the satisfaction of release created a rush of comforting feelings. Why had I not thought to do this before? If peeing my jeans was lucky, then this was sure to open some doors. I leaned forward and forced the last of it out as a triumphant spurt of pee escaped, as if to emphasize the point.

I rushed to my haircut, my backpack bouncing behind me, feeling that warm mass beneath me change with every step. There was no line and the barber motioned for me to take an empty chair. I put down my backpack and hopped in the chair. What had happened in the back of my pants slowly devoured my butt. It spread up and it spread back. Even while explaining to the barber the intricacies of my desired cut I felt it moving. It was a pleasant, but persistent sensation. Like sitting on a soft and damp cushion. In the mirror my reflection smiled wistfully back at me, but the barber was not smiling. In fact he wore a scowl. I guessed he’d had a bad day so I made a happy comment about the upcoming weekend. He didn’t smile and he didn’t reply. He mechanically cut my hair as I watched him in the mirror. I wondered why he was in such a rush. He finished and removed the plastic sheet from my shoulders with a flourish, sending my discarded hair clippings sprinkling to the floor. This was when I noticed the smell. It was defiantly, unapologetically present. Like a storm cloud or an angry swarm of bees. It penetrated the air with a sharpness that shocked me. As reality slowly set in I watched my expression in the mirror change to one of abject fear. The barber’s expression was set, still in a scowl of displeasure. “Twelve dollars” he said. I gave him twenty and got the hell out of there.

I tried to walk as casually as possible to the nearest bathroom leaving a trail of thick brown air in my wake. If people commented on it, I couldn’t hear them because I was so focused on getting that stink devil out of my pants. Inside the safety of a bathroom stall I gingerly unbuckled my belt and pulled down my jeans. My heart sank when I saw what I’d done. I’ll spare you the details. I’ll just say it was horrific, all encompassing and impossible to clean with only a roll of toilet paper at my disposal. I sighed as I pulled my pants back up. The familiar and comforting warm softness had been replaced by a cool, sticky pile of filth which stretched from the front of my underwear all the way to the back waste band. I slumped out of the stall to wash my hands, taking a second to twist and view the back side of my jeans. It was bad. It looked like I had a few sagging overripe avocados stuffed in the back, but it felt like guacamole. The wetness on the inside of my legs and top of my butt was undetectable though, and nothing brown had soaked through. All I had to do was get back to my dorm and into the showers on my floor.

I wasn’t completely without luck though. I didn’t see anyone I knew on my way to the dorms. Once inside I handed the security guard my student ID. He sniffed loudly and glared at me over his glasses, nodding for me to pass. In my haste I got on the first open elevator without a thought as to what that would mean. A gaggle of students crowded in after me. I stood at the back and tried to be invisible but the brown cloud of stink filled the elevator in a matter of seconds. No one knew who it was. People were gagging and holding their noses. I kept my cool, pretending to play with my phone when I noticed how quiet it had gotten. I looked up. They were staring at me. “Dude. What the fuck” the guy closest to me said. I felt my face flush and didn’t say anything. When the elevator door opened on the fourth floor he firmly pushed me out of it. I took the stairs the rest of the way.

Of course my dorm was filled with activity. It was almost Friday night. Half my hockey team was inside. Some playing video games, most just sprawled on the two beds playing with their phones. I said hi. Grabbed a towel and some clothes. As I closed the door I heard someone say in a hushed voice “oh he definitely shit his pants” followed by laughter. Fuck it. I was almost in the clear. Everybody shits their pants at some point in their lives right? Chances are most of them didn’t do it on purpose though, but my friends didn’t have to know that.

As I showered I thought up some great stories. Bad Mexican food, an obstinate professor who wouldn’t let me leave class, a prank involving brownies spiked with laxatives. All totally plausible. I threw out my jeans and underwear. Got dressed and went back to my dorm clean and fresh. It was quiet. They were all looking at me expectantly. “So what” I said “So I shit my pants, big deal”. And that was that. Oh they didn’t let it go, they actually never have, but to be honest the notoriety that I got from that ill fated experiment worked in my favor. When girls first hear about it they go absolutely crazy. In a good way. I’m not really sure why, but I’ll take any help I can get.

So maybe in the end it wasn’t the worst decision I’ve ever made, but it certainly wasn’t fun. Well, the first half hour wasn’t so bad I guess. I haven’t tried it again. Nothings going to stop me from my lucky pee spurts though.

Comments

  1. dukeofearl67

    Great story! Thanks for sharing! Hope you are still able to poop your pants, but maybe more discreetly next time 😉

  2. airborne

    That must have felt amazing until things started going wrong.

    I have made lots of them, especially when I was young. It’s like your desires overrides reasoning and you do it with no or not much contemplation for the repercussions it’s going to cause.

    Some of them have been,

    • Pushing a nice firm load into my underwear at a friend’s birthday party with we played cricket out the back of his house. When we finished playing his mother came out and announced she had arranged a sleepover and told me my parents had taken the opportunity to go out. Instantly the nice hard logs I had in my underwear took on a whole new reality.
    • Doing it in my underwear while I was at a friend’s farm after having a very close look and smell of his sisters’ panties while we were exploring. After the exhilaration of doing it the reality of my situation began to hit me. There were no toilets, no bathroom, nowhere to wash myself and we were going to a barbecue after.
    • Doing it in my underwear while walking back to a friend’s house after a party. He was working so I thought I was going to have the house to myself, but I was very wrong. Unknowingly to me quite a lot of our friends had already gone there. My friend had taken my car to work and when I got inside a group of girls were in the bathroom. Sitting down didn’t seem like a smart idea so I just stood around waiting for the bathroom. That worked until I stood beside a side table with a mirror on it.

  3. dukeofearl67

    I’ve always loved your stories airborne!! You have some awesome ones! Would love to hear what the consequences of all of these stories was.

  4. airborne

    Hi Dukeofearl67

    1. My first thought was to go to the toilet under their house but most of my friend’s family was still sitting around and I knew the toilet didn’t have a lock. My next idea was sneak upstairs, steal one of my friend’s underwear and go to the toilet, but the moment I tried my friends mum reminded me of the “no upstairs rule”. My next idea was to ignore my situation and hope for the best. Surprisingly that worked perfectly until it came to shower time. there was no getting out of shower at his house and like the toilet the downstairs bathroom didn’t have a lock. I didn’t even realize one of my friends had come in until he very loudly announced “Come in the bathroom everyone and check this out. ***** still shits in his pants”. The same guy that made the announcement got caught later that year with a load in his underwear at school. A few days after he got caught we had a we had very interesting conversation on the way home from school.

    2. By the time we finished exploring the load in my underwear had already spread out and riding the 4-wheel motorbike back totaled my underwear. As we rode back, I could feel the load moving up between my legs and up the back. That felt amazing but I also knew that unless a miracle occurred, I was going to getting found when we got back. To my surprise that didn’t happen and the longer no one did the more confident I got. That thought excited me and gave me the biggest erection I had even had. After a while my confidence was so high, I stopped wondering if I was going to get found out. That was unit one of my friends’ cousins saw between my legs while we sat under a rocky ledge to escape from the rain. As we sat there, I didn’t realize my erection was pushing my underwear away from my body giving everyone a view of the load in my underwear.

    3. The good part was the load in my underwear was really firm and not smelly, but the bad part was it was huge because I hadn’t pooed for at least couple of day. I could feel my underwear push hard against my pants and the load was so heavy I had to pull my underwear and pants up a couple of times. The problem with that was unbeknown to me pulling my pants up had moved the crotch to one side allowing anyone looking at the mirror a perfect view of my underwear. I’m not sure who saw first but whoever it was told everyone where to look before one of my friends said something like. “hay ***** you know there’s a mirror on that table beside you and everyone can see you shitted in underwear” there was a lot more said than that.

    Although there have been quite a few times I have been discovered there are much more I wasn’t.

  5. dukeofearl67

    Well I for one think you need to share your stories!!! I’m a fan!!!
    1. What did the conversation entail with your friend that called you out?
    2. What did your friends say when they caught sight of your dirty underwear?
    3. What were some of the comments made to you about shitting your underwear?

  6. airborne

    When my friend announced what he had found in the bathroom all the others came in and stood around looking at what he had found. At first, I didn’t want to get out of the shower knowing they were there, but it was soon obvious they were not going to leave. When I pulled the curtain back and looked my underwear were in the middle of the bathroom laid out with the load on full display. That was strange because I was sure I had put them under my shorts, but there was no point saying anything. The friend that found them did most of the talking and said stuff like,

    “Do you still do shits in your underwear”
    “how long ago did you do it, it looks like it’s been in them for ages”
    “how come you didn’t just go to the toilet”

    The other guys lost interest fairly quickly and went back outside but he stayed kept talking to me about it the entire time I dried myself and got changed. The only time he left was to get the spare underwear he had in his backpack. When he came back, he asked me more questions but stopped when I got angry with him. At the time I was embarrassed at getting found but when I got home the next day, I began to think about want had happened. It was embarrassing but the idea I had been found out started to excite me the more I thought about it. I also began to wonder why he had come in the bathroom and why did he seem so curious. None of us had planned to sleepover so why did he have spare underwear in his backpack and why had they already been worn. I wanted to ask him but was to scared, and eventually stopped thinking about it. That was until a few days after he got found out for doing it at school. He sat beside me when we got in the bus and after a bit of silence, he stated a very interesting conversation by saying, “hay, you know how you pooped in your underwear at Chris’s birthday party” when I said yes, he then asked “was it by accident or on purpose, its ok to say I think its cool if it was on purpose”. By the time we got to his stop it was clear we both liked doing it and he was the one that had taken my underwear.

    When my friend told me about the mirror on the table I looked down and was stunned at how visible my underwear where. Not only was the crotch of my pants all the way to one side the huge firm log I had done was pushing my underwear out. It was like the log was curious at what was going on and was trying to force its way out through my underwear. The underwear I was wearing had very thin but very stretchy material that clearly showered the start of the huge log I had done. when I looked back up it was immediately obvious everyone knew what I had done and somehow even the girls I the bathroom knew. All I could do was go to the bathroom door and demand the girl finish and pretend it was their fault I had done it in my underwear by saying “hurry up and finish you have been in their for ages. I told you I really need to go and now I have done it in my underwear”. The entire time I stood there waiting for the door to open my friends ridiculed me for what I had done. I couldn’t hear most of what they were saying because of the loud music playing but what I did clearly hear was what the girls said when they opened the door, the conversation went like this,

    One of the girls: “what did you say”
    A friend: “he’s done a shit in his pants and needs to use the bathroom”
    One of the girls “what, really have you really”
    Me: “yes, can you hurry up so I can use the bathroom”
    One of the girls: “oh my god he really has” (after she checked in the back of my pants)
    Me: “f**k off and let me in please.

    With that the girl that had checked the back of my pants pushed me into the bathroom and shut the door, then one of the other girls said, “well you better have a shower and clean yourself up”. There was no way I wanted to do that with them there, but it quickly became obvious they were not leaving until I did. When I finally gave in and got in the shower, I could hear some of my friends trying to open the door to the bathroom but fortunately the girls didn’t let them. When I finished and pulled the shower curtain back, I was stunned to discover all the girls standing there looking at me. That might sound like a good experience, but it wasn’t for me. Having a group of girls standing there staring at me in the nude was rather confronting and very uncomfortable. It wasn’t until the next party we were at that I began to realize that experience did have its benefits, when one of the girls dared me to take my clothes off.

    My friends made fun of me for pooping in my underwear for moths after and one of them didn’t let me forget for years. Everything we were out together he reminded me of what happened and went into great detail to tell anyone that wasn’t there.

  7. andyaz

    Nice writing! I liked the way you described how initial feelings of humiliation later morphed into feelings of sexual excitement. I’m not into poop, but I’ve had this happen many times when peeing my pants in public. There’s a fine line between pain and pleasure.