This is what happened to me yesterday.
As most of u know it: Iâ€™m a diaper lover for many years now and I have been wearing diapers or training pants for fun 24/7 for more than a year and I have been using them for their intended purpose very fully! And this is what I wanna change!
For short I took the decision to move to the Netherlands and settle there in order to start a real new life not involving diaps.
A very close friend of mine lives in Amsterdam in a big house with room mates. As I told him about my project, he said: well, the lonely thing you need to do is to buy your tickets and an inflatable mattress; I will provide you the accommodation. No worries!
Sure he knows about my special like, but he often teases me in a gentle way with this diaper thing. I told to myself that at age 33, almost 34, it should be time to leave my diaps and finally become a big boy! I will be so proud of myself to travel without any diap and spend the whole trip as a big boy, only wearing sexy boxers and briefs.
I have been giving tries for 14 days and till now, no accident, even at night! So proud of me! This is always the problem when you use to wet and mess your diaps no matter where ever you are; you do it and know that you are protected! Nobody knows it or even notices it and it makes you happy to feel everything in your crotch area: so nice and comfy!
The lonely thing which annoys me now is to have some precum spots on my undies or pants for everyone to see, which is hard to hide most of the time! Iâ€™m someone who easily can get aroused even by simple thoughts, like a teenager would! A good looking woman passing by and you can be sure that I get a stiff or feel some precum invading my boxer! Boys, you know for sure this warm wet nice feeling! A friend of mine called me â€œa lubricant companyâ€! As he woke up at home last time, in my bed, he asked me if I have wet the bed because he saw a large spot on the sheets! Not at all: it was only my night production of lubricant! I was too excited, like almost every night! Maybe I should have more sexual encounters to fix that!
Yesterday I went to a shop and bought the requested inflatable mattress.
As I went to the cashier, I heard my stomach gurgling. But I didnâ€™t care. I felt some belly cramping and thought I only needed to loosen a big fart. I paid for the mattress and went to my car. On the way forwards, I decided to fart, without even thinking I had no diaper on and let it out. OMG: I pushed just a little and I only heard a small fart but it was too late! Within a few seconds a releasing big wet fart came out and I had it all in my briefs. On one hand it made some good but on the other one I could feel a kinda runny shit spreading between my bum cheeks and running to my legs! Disgusting! I couldnâ€™t help it. I felt really embarrassed as I realized that I didnâ€™t wear any diap and the big spot might show on my short and legs for everyone to see. Fortunately for me, there was nobody behind me who could see it. Second problem was to sit in my car: in a close past, I always had diapers in my car as well as Pampers towels, but because Iâ€™d like to become a real big boy, I have thrown everything away (at least from the car!). Then I had to sit in my car with a soiled short. I hate this wet and smelly feeling. And I donâ€™t like to soil my sport car in such a way.
As I drove back home, I felt this big wet spot becoming cold. It was awful! And as soon as I arrived home, I ran to the lift, with the hope that nobody would be in and for God sake, nobody was in. I had a look in the mirror and saw a large brown spot on my bum area and a long brown and deep green skid down to my right leg. I felt so ashamed: I, almost 34, trying to act as a big boy I am, messed my boxer and short in public.
Now Iâ€™m wondering how I will stand my 10 hours long bus trip to Amsterdam without any diap. I am a bit scared, I have to admit it. And what about my everyday life in Amsterdam? My friend knows my diaper issue and despite his constant gentle teasing and joking; he has no problem with it, as long as I donâ€™t run in the flat only dressed by a diap. But if I want to be the real big boy I am, and if I soil his furniture just because I am not properly potty trained, what would he say?! Would he force me to be back to my diaps as long as I can’t stay dry and clean?! I guess it would be a fantasy of mine but this is not the aim! I wanna become the big boy I am! No diap any more!
Is it really time for me to leave my diapers? Should I delay my potty training? Or should I consider it as an accident, which is the case? But do big boys have such accidents? And in the bus? There are almost 10 hours to spend sat. OMG, how will I manage to keep my bladders and bowels? Maybe I should wear a diap only for the bus trip and act as the big boy I am in Amsterdam without any diap. Other solution: just in case of such an accident, I should wear some line boosters in my briefs. But in that case, my challenge would fail! And do big boys wear line boosters in their briefs?! Iâ€™m feeling scared and would really like to take control again! After all, I had only one accident in 14 days. What would you recommend?!