Getting a “FREE RIDE”!

I am always looking for a way to ” get off” the easy way. I’m 66 yrs old and it gets harder for me to “drop my load”. I will tell my experiences how I got off free.
(1) ) I had a Creepy Crawley (TM) to clean my private swimming pool One day when I was in the pool, I got a little “horney”. I noticed in order for the cleaner to move from side to side, back & forth, up & down it pulsed the water thru the hose and vibrated as it moved forward.. I had a 2 speed pump – high & lo. I put the motor on high and shoved the hose between my legs and let it vibrate my nuts and underside of my cock. I t felt OK but I really couldn’t get off. The vibration was a little much for my nuts hurting more than feeling good. I switched the motor to low speed and as I held the hose on my nuts and underside of my dick it did get me off after about 20 minutes. I then found a way to put my legs around the front of the Creepy resting my nuts and underside of my dick on the plastic frame and spreading my legs straight out in front and laying back in the water. This way I could ride around with the Creepy and “get off” as well. It had much better sensitivity and my swim trunks cummed in about 10 minutes. I used to do this quite often and really wanted to shit in my trunks while I was “riding” but afraid there would be leakage. This is a good way to” get off” and you won’t have any control over the cumming. I would just go with it and let the auto cum do it’s thing. It felt sooooo good!
(2) About 6 years ago, I was on vacation in New England area and while I was in the motel swimming pool, I found a return jet of forced water about 6 inches above my dick. I wanted to have the water run over the front of my dick to see if I could “get off”. I was all alone in the pool. I lifted myself up by holding on to the top of the pool and let the water rush over my dick. It felt so good and within about 5 minutes, I felt the urge to cum. I looked around to make sure nobody was watching me and out of the corner of my eye, I saw the evening manager standing) at the opposite side of the pool watching me ( somewhat behind me but just in view). She was an ” old hag” and I tried not to look real suspicious. I guess she probably knew what I was doing but I didn’t give a fuck nor could I stop. I was ready to cum. Suddenly, It went off like a stick of dynamite. I blew cum all over the inside of my speedo swim trunks. After I shot my load, the rushing water coming from the jet output tickled my dick and I began laughing wondering if the old hag was still watching. (Wondering if the old hag wanted me to fuck her). Then I saw she was gone. She may have left just before I shot off! What a beautiful experience that I will remember for ever. One of the best auto-cums I’ve ever done . I want to go back to that same motel and do it all over again, maybe this summer. I often fantasized about shitting my trunks full while the water shoots all over my dick while I cum. Unfortunately, I can’t and won’t shit my trunks in a public pool . But I know, with a doubt, that would be the ultimate feeling!!!
(3) Several years ago, while swimming, I found a real nice soft clay area in very shallow water as I was walking around . My feet were sinking into the soft clay and I was up to my ankles with nice soft clay mud. I put my finger in it and it was just about the right consistency for what I needed. I explored all around it to be sure there was no stones, glass, sticks, rocks, stone, roots, etc. to assure myself it was pure. It was just 100% clay and mud. I went back to my vehicle, and got a rubber. I walked back to the place and by now my dick was rock hard! I pulled down my trunks in front and stuck my dick into the nice soft clay.. WOW – it felt soooo good. I started moving my dick in and out of the soft clay as I shit in my trunks. After I filled them, (and they were FULL), I got so excited my dick shot it’s load into the rubber buried in the nice soft clay. It was a real nice soft feeling, and it felt like my dick was in pussy. After I shot my load, I just laid there, ass sitting on the clay mound, enjoying my nice load of shit in my trunks. What a beautiful feeling. This summer, I will return to this area so I can do it all over again. I’ve been fantasizing about it several times recently, and now I’m just waiting for the water to warm up – probably by the end of March. I can hardly wait!!!
(4) About 10 years ago, I had a mid sized older car with bad shocks. One day, on the way to work, I opted to take a shortcut to work on an old dirt road. It had rained several days before, and I was cruising down the road at about 50 mph. The road was totally unsteerable and undriveable at that speed. I couldn’t keep the car on the road. I slowed it down to 20-25 mph and found it much easier to handle. The road had washboard ripples about 1 to 2 inches high and about every 2 to 3 inches apart. As I drove along the road my nuts and dick were getting vibrated. I pulled off to the side of the road and took my pants off and drove with just my swim trunks on . As I drove down the road, maybe a mile or so, my balls and dick were vibrating so much, I was able to get off, AUTOMATICALLY! It felt so good! I had no control for the cumming. I just sat there and enjoyed it. Before I drove back onto the main road, I pulled over on the side of the road, and wiped my dick off , then put my pants back on. I wanted to do this that afternoon on the way back home only I want to shit my swim trunks full, as I drive down the washboard road. But, unfortunately, I couldn’t do it that night due to other things that came up (besides my dick), so I put it off for a week or so. Then, when I returned, ready with a good shit stored up,, I find a road grader re-graded the road and all the ripples were gone. Dammit! I was going to have a good time in my trunks and the fuck heads threw a monkey-wrench into the works. Damn, I was sooooo fucking mad. I was ready with a hard-on and ready to fill my trunks. I returned back a few months later after we had some good rains hopeing to get off again. To my surprise, the County paved the road with asphalt! (BUMMER)!!! No more ripples or “free rides” on that road.
(5) About 5 years ago, I fucked a pussy on a washing machine with the load unbalanced. She sat on the washer, and I stood on a stool with my dick up her pussy.
As it vibrated, My dick went into auto mode and when I came, I didn’t have to do anything. She did slight movement on her pussy, which helped to get me more excited! I really wanted to shit my pants but I didn’t want her to know that I do it. I’ve known her for quite a while and I thought it best to keep it secret. She knows some of my friends & relatives and I didn’t want the word spread around. Sure would like to try it with someone who is into the same thing!
I’ve never tried any of the fake pussys or blow job mouths available at sex shops, so I can’t tell you anything about those. I guess they would do ok too. I know they have vibrators that go inside your pants and vibe your dick until you shoot your wad! I might try one of them someday. I’ll get a waterproof one that I can slip inside my trunks, then go out into the water and shit my pants as I auto-cum inside my trunks & water.
(6) I have a removable shower head on my shower with about 100 ports (openings) to spray the water. It has a few different settings from soft to full force of the water. I take the removable head off the overhead holder and put it under my nuts. The soft setting does not do too much but the medium to high range drives my balls crazy. With the water warm or just slightly hot, my nuts are being tickled by the water hitting them. It only takes about 10 minutes to work up a good cum and all you need to do is hold the sprayer under your nuts – (I am naked in the shower). But, I have recently found a way to put it down behind my trunks (ass) when I wear them into the shower,and position it low so as to spray my balls without holding it. I just stand there and it automatically makes me cum. (LOOK MA, NO HANDS)!
*** I hope you enjoyed this article of the various ways I “get off” and I’m always looking for new ways. Iif you have any ways to auto-cum , please share them with me.. I’ll try it myself. I love to auto-cum and shit my pants together at the same time. . I like the idea that I can’t control my cumming with auto-cum and I have to” go with the flow”. Once it starts, it’s a go all the way! FYI: I tried to cum and shit my pants at the very same time. I couldn’t do it because while I was automatically shitting as the cum came out, the shitting stopped until I was done. Once the cumming. was over the shit came out without any help. It’s like trying to sneeze without shutting your eyes!
AUTO – CUMMING IS FUN! Try it and let me know of your adventures. I do it every chance I possibly can! It’s all good… [ But don’t get me wrong] – PUSSY is still a good thing to fuck and eat! I need to do it too.

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  1. I love all the inventive ways you have got off. I once came in my knickers sitting on the bus on the way to work. The seat was over the wheels and the vibrations were just right. And no I didn’t poo myself, but I was dying for a wee.

  2. Yes, I made it to the Ladies’, it would have been a disaster otherwise! I was only about 19 or 20 and definitely not into weeing myself at the time 🙂

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