This just in. I was talking with my friend Anthony the other night. We were a bit drunk, and he told me about an incident at the Puyallup Fair back when he was 17.
For those who don’t know, the Puyallup Fair is held every year, it’s very, very popular, tons of food and great rides. When I first realised I liked guys I use to revel in the scenery. Puyallup is about 38 miles south of Seattle, and the fair always a highlite of my September.
Anthony went with two girls (before he ‘came out’, hehe) and they made the mistake of gorging on barbecued pork. Like any state fair, the food is well regulated, but for some reason the booth serving the pork had done something wrong and the food was contaminated. Both the girls Anthony was with got ill and had to run to the portable loos. Anthony didn’t feel like wretching at the time, but told me ‘he didn’t feel good’.
After the girls cleaned out their mouths, the three of them decided to try out a few of the rides, including -fatefully- the ferris wheel. It made a slow rotation as people at the bottom climbed into their pods. As luck would have it, when Anthony and the girls were at the summit, you guessed it, Anthony suddenly poohed his pants. Furthermore -at least this was how Anthony recalled it to me- there was a momentary technical glitch with the wheel and they were stuck at the top for about 4 minutes or so. Anthony said that the girls pretty much figured out what had happened.
After eventually alighting, Anthony ran to the closest loo, but there was a line! So he stood there with a mess in his pants for ‘what seemed like eternity’.
As if this wasn’t enough, Anthony had driven the girls to the fair in his dad’s car, and now it was clearly time to go home. He told me he put some newspaper on the seat to avoid stinking it up, and maybe that worked. After Anthony dropped the girls off at their respective homes, Anthony got home himself and told me that he was a complete mess. He threw his briefs in a dumpster and his jeans into the hamper. Hardly the end of the saga- Anthony’s mother a few days later asked him if there had been an accident.
As far as I know, Anthony never had an issue with pants pooping since, if so, he did not admit. And I do not know him well enough to tell him that I have messed my underwear, most notably when I was also 17.